It’s probably not a good thing that instead of truly getting invested in this film, I spent the majority of my time watching The Lovebirds trying to remember the plot of Date Night, right?

Basic Synopsis: A couple in the midst of a breakup flee for their lives after having front row seats to a stranger running down a bicyclist with their car.

First Things First: Get this Eyes Wide Shut nonsense outta my movies!

Brief Thoughts: The Lovebirds was off to a rocky start when it immediately decided against ingratiating the two lead characters to the audience by putting them through a rather lengthy and obnoxious argument, so much so that for a large percentage of the film I didn’t know if I even wanted them to get back together considering a break might be what’s best for the two of them. That said, I did enjoy Issa Rae and Kumail Nanjiani together enough to be won over eventually; I just wish they’d been given a script of more substance. So much of it felt like the jokes were prioritized over writing honest scenes and characters, with most words spoken being solely to set up the punchlines littered throughout this bare minimum, disjointed plot that forms a rather unsatisfying, quickly wrapped up whole.

Least Favorite Line: “Is that blood on your face?” “And it’s a big disgrace.” BOOOOOOO. This is the type of joke you immediately apologize for saying, if you were dad enough to let it escape the confines of your brain.

Favorite Line: “To win the Amazing Race you need to be a team. You need to be on the same page. I feel like I’m on one page of the book and you’re like reading a magazine.”

Quick Questions:

• How many jokes has this writer had stolen from them?
• Who in their right mind would choose having their face melted by bubbling bacon grease over getting punted by a horse?
• Was anyone else a little thrown by how all over the place the soundtrack was? There’s a scene where these frat boys start out by listening to “Semi-Charmed Life” before the music switches to a rap song that I am definitely not cool enough to have heard before, and I couldn’t help wondering “who are these people!?”
• If someone gave you a manila envelope and told you not to open it because it’s filled with a bunch of dirty pics, how many seconds would you wait after they left the room to take a peek inside?

Biggest Complaint: As wasted as Anna Camp and Kyle Bornheimer are with their blink and you’ll miss them roles (maybe a bunch of their scenes were cut?), I feel like the biggest wasted character was the setting of the film, New Orleans. Maybe it’s just my outsider’s perspective that has built up this city into something far more mythical than it actually is, but it just feels like such a missed opportunity that the film isn’t infused with the distinct culture and people the city is known for.

Final Thoughts: The Lovebirds is good for some laughs, but if I haven’t completely forgotten the film by tomorrow I will be shocked.

So what’d you think of The Lovebirds? Be sure to let me know in the comments below or over on twitter, where you can find me at BewareOfTrees.