The best acting, directing, and writing categories are for others to decide, I focus on the more important aspects of films in 2018:
Best Nose-based Errotica: A Star is Born
Somebody out there was probably really into it
Best Performance By an Inanimate Object: The Nail in A Quiet Place
Best Elderly Meet Cute: The Old Man and the Gun
They began ravaging each other shortly after that shot
Best Heist: Peter B Parker stealing that bagel from Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse
Best Multitasking: Buscemi plotting while running in The Death of Stalin
Jason Isaacs almost won a second award for this film as “Most Masculine Organism”
Best Dance Scene: The Favourite
This is the best dance scene since Oscar Isaac tore up the dance floor in Ex Machina
Best Cape Foreplay: Solo: A Star Wars Story
Best Job Interview: Sorry to Bother You
I’m totally going to bring a trophy to my next interview
Most Terrifying Thing…Ever: The Bear Yell in Annihilation
Most Versatile Actor: Olivia, the dog from Game Night and Widows
That’s right Olivia is the John C Reilly of animals, able to provide a great performance in a comedy and a drama in the same year
Best Rhino Call: Daniel Kaluuya in Black Panther
I haven’t seen a rhino call this well executed in years
Best Depiction of a Racist Time Traveler: Josh Brolin in Deadpool 2
Most Pointless Army of Superhero Fodder: Thanos’ Army in Avengers: Infinity War
Say what you will about the Chitauri in the first Avengers, but at least their army had a name
I’m on twitter: @5DollarWrench
Middle of the Row 